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Professional hater David Cross takes down almost the entire summer movie slate in an E! Online interview. Funny, we thought that despite his initial resistance, he was totally going to fall in love with Garfield! How can he savage a lasagna-eating cat who hates Mondays, which will almost certainly be a better talking feline movie than Catwoman? (Though admittedly one with slightly less masturbatory potential.) Does he like anything?

UPDATE: Oh yes, he likes them a little better if they have a "2" in the title and he's getting a paycheck.

Cross on Troy: "Let's see...How many overweight, single secretaries are there in America? Multiply that number by $10.25, and you'll know how much money Troy will make."

Cross on Garfield: The Movie: "When the f—k was Garfield popular? I was looking at a poster for it on the side of a bus stop in my neighborhood, in the East Village in New York, and I'm thinking, Who the f—k in the East Village is gonna go see Garfield? Why are they advertising that here?Like, what face-tattooed junkie is gonna save up his money for Garfield: The Movie?"

Cross on Spider-Man 2: "I'm gonna wait for the candy bar and eat that."