Lloyd Grove has a cheery report of last night's celebrity-filled "Downtown Seder," but it seems like our correspondent was at a totally different event:

Last night I went to something called The Downtown Seder (even though Passover doesn't officially start until today). Famous and semi-famous Jews were culled to partake in this fake seder by doing a little 1-2-3 kind of act that somehow related to the holiday. Stiller and Meara were there (their bit was called "Matzah" and had nothing at all to do with the big crackers), Dr. Ruth was there (her Passover advice "try a new position tonight." My question is: before or after I slaughter a lamb and put its blood on my door?"). Anyway, when I turned around from my seat I saw Lou Reed (Jew) and DOG come in (no, I'm not being mean and talking about Laurie Anderson, although she was there too. He has a little lap dog with him.) Laurie and Lou were meant to face each other at the table, but when Lou saw that he grumbled "No, she sits HERE." Loudly. People let him. He is scary. He is old. He didn't smile at all even when people were being truly funny. His part in the fake seder was that he read from his own book called The Raven. Super depressing stuff about dying and shit. Had nothing to do with Passover. I was hoping that he brought his dog as a sacrifice, but no, he just read from his stupid book (sunglasses on). He was very proud of himself and sauntered back to his table — and to his dog. They all (Laurie, dog, and some children they brought with them.) left before the meal was served and said goodbye to no one. Gee, I wonder why people hate Jews?