FRIDAY
1. Celebrate 10 years of gay-ery at the SqueezeBox Anniversary Party with Boy George, The Jayne County Five, Miss Guy, Bebe Buell, Jackie Beat, Jimmy James and hostess Misstress Formika.
2. Get your nails done by contemporary artists (Warn Defever, Davin Brainard, Hitoko Sakai, Sarah Lapinksi, Dion Fischer and Ida Pearl) at Broadway Spa.
3. It's everything you loved about the prom minus the virginity and the vomit. Head to Volume for the Slasher Prom and dance like an awkward 17-year old to World War Walter, DJ Dirrty, Oxi Conttontail and Larocka.

SATURDAY
1. Asians love to rock it. Go figure! Head to Piano's for Asian Rock Fest 2004.
2. Get a little tipsy and yell things like, "My mom pitches better than you!" to the cast of the Sopranos and other celebrities at the Stars and Strikes Downtown softball game .
3. Skateboarders are a multi-tasking breed. You thought they just hung out in local malls and transformed public property into obstacles of death. But they write about their feelings too. Editors Justin Hocking, Jeffrey Knutson and Jared Maher cough up the proof in Skateboarders Write from the Deep End. Dirty on Purpose provides the soundtrack. Bowery Poetry Club, 308 Bowery, (212) 614-0505. 7 p.m.

SUNDAY
1. What the fuck was Ulysses about, anyway? We didn t read it either, but the enlightened souls at the Brooklyn Public Library are giving you a second chance. Pick up a copy at the library s Book Fair, and at least pretend like you ll swap your Bergdorf Blondes for your James Joyce.
2. A little misogyny and playa hatin' never hurt anyone. At least that s what my mama told me. In any case, polish those 22s, pop that Cristal, and check out Pharoahe Monch, Scratch, and MOP gettin' all what what for the Weapons of Mic Destruction tour.
3. Throw those feisty underdogs at MoveOn.org a bone and head over to the George Bush Retirement Party in Brooklyn. Coked-up Yalie undergrads and weird Brown people need not attend.
4. Don some horn-rimmed glasses, 3 days of facial hair, and some cut-up Diesels and go see the 2004 M.F.A. Thesis exhibition over at Columbia.
5. Algonquin Round Table walking tour, Sunday, May 23, Noon. Meet at Hotel Algonquin, 59 W. 44th Street, visit the places Dorothy Parker, Robert Benchley, and friends drank in, screwed in, worked in. Special for Gawker fans: they are visiting the 1919 Conde Nast offices, the 1925 New Yorker office, and the speakeasies the freelancers drank in.