From New York mag's gossip columnist Deborah Schoeneman's birthday party, held Saturday night on the roof of the Gramercy Park Hotel. (Uh, is it just me, or did blind items get a lot less blind while I was on vacation?)

· "Which would-be magazine publisher who is constantly allegedly re-launching his hipster magazine had the following exchange with which pasta-loving reality-show chef: Chef: 'You're fat.' Publisher: 'You're cancelled.'"

· "Which Swedish porn producer, with a reputation as a ladies' man (not as a lady-man), was seen minting up his mouth before some tongue action with a pretty and very infamous boy?"