You'll never have to read about Paris Hilton again after Sunday's 4000-word summation by Guy Martin in the Observer magazine. It makes Paris's porn-tape-crisis publicist, Dan Klores, look mighty good along the way:

'It was a risk,' says Klores. 'I shut down everything she was doing. I shut down everything the Fox people - her own network - were doing with her. I said, "I'll take the hit for this." I like being in the fight. From the start the only thing I was gonna let her do was Saturday Night Live. Her father said, "You're the only one she listens to." She was scared of me, which is what I wanted. But she was very disciplined; she came to New York, didn't go anywhere and stayed in. She's a child. She may be 23, but she's a young 23.'

Gee, I hope that when my porn tape hits the internet people will call me "disciplined" because I stay at home in the Waldorf Astoria instead of gallivanting around to every party in Manhattan.
Downloads are a girl's best friend [Observer]