One rule that should have made it onto The Stranger's list of rules for gays: never ever ever spend $20,000 on a dog just because Bette Midler touched it.

Around midnight a golden retriever loped into the party followed by the "Hairspray'' lyricists MARC SHAIMAN and SCOTT WITTMAN.

Mr. Wittman said the dog's name was WALLI, after WALLIS SIMPSON.

"I got her at an auction at the Waldorf-Astoria,'' Mr. Wittman said. "It was for the New York Restoration Project, and BETTE MIDLER brought her on stage and they were bidding.''

The question that has become our Boldface mantra: How much?

Mr. Wittman laughed.

"I'm embarrassed to say. I was going to call her TWENTY GRAND.''

Edward VIII Would've Called It a Bargain [NYT]