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Is this your shoe? If so, that means you were in Central Park last night, blabbing about the Hamptons and your publishing job during the free concert. The nice strangers next to you stole one of your shoes because you don't know when the hell to shut up. Their confession follows.

Our shoe-stealing music lover writes:

We really wanted to hear David Robertson conduct and Leonidas Kavakos' violin tonight in Central Park. We got there at 5:30 to the Great Lawn and scored a nice spot on the ballfield. It was a perfect evening of wine and good weather. However, at 8:00, this posse of stupid people showed up. The 12 of them proceeded to make the sounds of Ives, Barber and Adams act as the background music for their chatter about jobs in publishing and "media buys" and the Hamptons. This went on for 2+ hours and really took away from the music. So when the Grucci fireworks were over, we quietly rolled up our blanket, careful to snag a lone shoe. At least one bitch would hobble out of the park tonight.

[UPDATE: Never mind that, well, everyone WANTS to love classical music but not everyone cares what it actually is. As a couple of smart readers pointed out, the Ives/Barber/Adams concert was last week, and last night's concert was Smetena/Mendelssohn/Rimsky-Korsakov.]