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The Defamer correspondent on Rabble-Rousing, Slovenly Directors Dining Out in Hollywood checks in with this brief report starring everyone's favorite man of the people, Michael Moore:

Last night we went to Musso & Frank for our usual Thursday night dinner. At the table across from our booth were two bodyguards, in sunglasses, wire in the ear, the whole bit. We didn't see anybody that important, so we asked our waiter whose body they were guarding. MICHAEL MOORE!

The fat load was at a booth with Roger Ebert and some Hollywood types. Moore is so fat (how fat is he?) he had to sit outside the booth in a chair. I guess Mr. Man Of the People is a little scared of those people. Later, Ebert came over to see if Moore's bodyguards were okay, and we talked to him a little while. He started talking to us because we were in our regular booth next to the bar, which was also Orson Welles' booth, apparently. He was very cool. I should add that we've been eating there every Thursday for years, seen hundreds of celebs, and never seen any w/bodyguards until now.

If there's a lesson here, it's that your favorite celebrities are irresposibly unprotected while dining at Musso & Frank. Don't they know there are tourists crawling just a few feet away on Hollywood Boulevard? Moore's got the right idea: We wouldn't want unexpected human contact within a mile of the Walk of Fame.