Due to internet troubles hither and yonder, I'm currently working from a tin can in Queens. Just so you know.

· PETA wages war on supermodel Cindy Crawford, who used to be a "friend" of the animal rights activists, for modeling fur. They've planned several protests outside of hubby Randy Gerber's bars, which is great, since Gerber's establishments haven't seen this kind of buzz in years. [Page Six]
· An upcoming New York mag article will profile the Bush twins and reveal exactly what we know: they're totally awesome drunks. [NYDN]
· Crisis in preppyville: Kate Spade and hubby Andy Spade are separated. Light a candle near your boxy satin handbag and say a silent prayer for them to reunite. [Page Six]
· Has alpha-skank Paris Hilton actually found her rabid chihuahua, Tinkerbell? Reports are surfacing that the dog may still be missing and Paris is toting around Tinkerbell's "body double." [NYDN]