This image was lost some time after publication, but you can still view it here.

Roger L. Simon reports on his blog that the the Motion Picture Academy has come up with a brilliant idea to combat the supposedly rampant piracy of the screener DVDs that members are sent at awards time. Each Academy member will be issued a magical DVD player that can play enchanted, copy-proof discs issued by studios keenly attuned to the evil sorcery of copyright infringement. We suppose this solution proved much more cost-effective and efficient than an earlier plan to have Academy president Frank Pierson travel the country with a reel-to-reel projector and an armed bodyguard, assuring that viewers weren't transcribing films for later posting on internet bulletin boards.

Of course, this new antipiracy tactic will wreak havoc with the underground, awards-time Hollywood economy, in which Academy members use screeners of the year's Miramax Oscar-baiting current release as a crude currency, exchanging them for the goods and services of unconnected peons, friends, and family.