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In a fit of unexplained hunger, our dark overlord gobbled up the rodents that keep our tech-cave running and service has been spotty. As an unfortunate result, I haven't had a chance to address the Chloe Sevigny As Morrissey Stalker issue. But, in brief: after trailing the depressing singer up and down the East coast, she was indeed at this weekend's Radio City show, where she looked "orgasmic" and sported the traditional overalls that we've come to know and love her for. Afterwards, Chloe was spotted at LES hipster hell Max Fish, where we hear she danced and spoke in tongues whenever the DJ played Moz.

So, to clarify: Chloe Sevigny REALLY likes Morrissey and is carrying his asexual babies.