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Treat yourself to the box office predictions that only taste indulgent. We promise they won't go to your thighs.

1. Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events — $45 million
It's Jim Carrey, it's Christmas, it's a movie based on children's books arguably only exceeded in popularity by something called Harry Potter. Paramount and DreamWorks should be ashamed of themselves that this estimate isn't $150 million. Blame Paramount, that's the safe thing to do.

2. Ocean's Twelve — $22 million
Does anyone love this movie? We didn't, and it contained a plot point involving Julia Roberts that was so mind-bogglingly offensive to our sensibilities that we wanted to walk out. Then we saw something shiny (Clooney's teeth, probably) and went back to eating Milk Duds, and it was all over soon enough.

3. Spanglish — $13 million
Once again, Adam Sandler insists on showing America that he can act, instead of running around and hitting shit with a hockey stick and making $20 million a movie.

4. Flight of the Phoenix — $7 million
This movie stars Giovanni Ribisi and Dennis Quaid. Anything beyond that is a mystery to us and to the world.

5. Blade: Trinity —$6 million
To paraphrase Wesley Snipes in the incredible Passenger 57, "Always bet on black...to drop off precipitously in the second week of release."