· Dirty-talking, innuendo-making Canadian Melissa Burns hosts "Because We Love You" at Orchard Bar tonight. If you attend and do not, in fact, love her back, please don't blame the messenger. [Paper]
· The kimono-clad Yoshida Brothers—Japan's version of Animal Collective—bring their neo-folk sound to the Knitting Factory tonight. That shit is free, too. [KF]
· Already at Knitting Factory? Too lazy to leave? Stick around for Cock Rock Disco, featuring laptop-smasher Jason Forest (aka Donna Summer) and Duran Duran Duran. [flavorpill]