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Hollywood PrivacyWatch celebrity sightings are sent in by our readers. Send yours to tips@defamer.com and let the world know that someone who looks like Jack Nicholson might've been checking you out.

In today's intimidatingly star-packed episode: Natalie Portman braving the rain in the name of shopping; Denzel Washington, Jack Nicholson, and Chingy watch the Lakers; Chris Rock at the mall, Nicky Hilton at Rite Aid; Vince Vaughn at the Grove; Kirsten Dunst at the Secret Machines show; Scarlett Johansson and Jared Leto at Spaceland; Marcia Cross taunting the tabloids by dining with a woman (gasp!); James Brown; Shawn Wayans; Dan Aykroyd; Jennifer Love Hewitt; Tyra Banks; Tracy Morgan; Rob Reiner; Willie Garson, Eliza Dushku, and Brian "I Was Booted Off American Idol and All I Got Was This Lousy T-shirt" Dunkelman; Kyle MacLachlan, Nicole Richie, and Orlando Jones; Kevin Smith; Anna Nicole Smith; Jane Leeves; Luke Perry; Ian Ziering; Corin Nemec; Marilu Henner; Bobby Lee and Ike Barinholtz.

· Yesterday (2/17) while it started to drizzle rain in Beverly Hills, I was trekking down the street sans umbrella when I spotted Natalie Portman and 2 men exiting some store called Tag Rag. The men started running as if they were going to melt while conservatively dressed and stunningly beautiful Natalie Portman nonchalantly strolled through the rain without an umbrella. I hate to report that she had a face full of makeup, though....

· Saw the gorgeous Denzel Washington and wife Pauletta sitting 3 rows up from the floor at the Laker/Jazz game last night. Nice to see he actually takes his wife, not mistress. Of course, Jack Nicholson was there too, talking shit to the officials. Then I spotted Chingy (all blingy and courtside). It was hard to see them since I was sitting in a suite, but we used binoculars (I just wanted to mention that was actually in a suite, not the nosebleeds for once). Sadly, a naked Jeannie Buss was nowhere to be found...

· 2/18, about 2 pm: Chris Rock, strolling through the Century City mall, talking on cell phone.

2/21, about 5pm: Nicky Hilton, shopping at the Rite Aid on Canon in Beverly Hills. Very impressive:
while talking on her cell, she took a bag of potato chips off the rack and started eating them before
paying. I left before her, so I can't say whether she eventually did pay. On my way out, I noticed a
paparazzo armed with a large camera peering into the store through the windows.

· Was at the Grove on Sunday night waiting in the lobby of the movie theater. A woman with three kids in tow walked towards the doors screaming into her cell phone that she was looking right at "her favorite actor." I glanced out the door and it was Vince Vaughn holding court with two buddies in the dead center of the Grove doing nothing to look
inconspicuous whatsoever. The two fellows laughed at every witticism coming out of Vaughn's mouth as they appeared to be waiting for someone.

· Monday night, Avalon, The Secret Machines & Moving Units show: Kirsten Dunst. She sat in the VIP section with a handful of twenty- and thirty-something industry types, her dark-rimmed Bambi eyes visible halfway across the place (which is a compliment - she looked like an achingly pretty [if somewhat starving] bohemian).

· In LA, I went to the Prosaics gig at Spaceland. Band was typically awesome and the crowd-scanning also interesting. Carlos D was there, surrounded by a bevvy of attractive ladies. I wish I had something bad to say about
him, but I bumped into him at the bar and he was super nice and polite. Also there showing neo-Goth love were Jared Leto and Scarlett Johansson. He was adorable (but annoyingly self-conscious) with long hair and Scarlet was petite and BUXOM. She was really pretty and curvy. Neither of them look like they do on camera.

· I just saw Marcia Cross at 17th Street Café on Montana in Santa Monica. In person she is really pretty, but really pale, very skinny and not as tall as she looks compared to the other desperate hobbits. She was with another woman who I at first assumed was her bull dike lover because she was wearing biker boots and had (gasp!) substantial thighs. But on closer inspection she just looked like a normal woman [Ed.note—Whew! That was close. Thank God she's "normal."], probably her neighbor or something. The oddest part was when Marcia got up to leave she put on a hat straight out of Indiana Jones. Weird.

· Was walking to the Roxy on 2/14 to hear some bands that were guaranteed to shatter my eardrums, when we see a man who looks suspiciously like James Brown coming out of the Rainbow. My friend and I thought he was an
impersonator, but everybody was taking a picture with him. I finally mustered up the courage to take a photo with him, when his jabba the bodyguard smacked me down. Wha? Is it because I'm not a blonde? Anyway, James was wearing the darkest shades at nighttime, and had impossibly smooth, evenly coloured skin.

· Shawn Wayans ate solo last Friday night. We sat next to him at Real Food Daily in W. Hollywood. He was wearing a very oversized Tommy Hillfiger colorblock polarfleece, jeans and boots, and was sipping on a raspberry
ginger ale. He definitely seemed more interested in his Sidekick than his food. Maybe as soon as Paris is released from her contract, he can opt-into the T-Mobile commercial line-up,

· I grew up in the 80s and I have a soft spot for everyone who was in Ghostbusters, so shoot me for being excited about this: I was eating post-screening pie at the Mel's on Sunset tonight when in strolls an extremely confused and dishevelled looking Dan Aykroyd. He walked the perimeter of the diner like he was supposed to meet someone, looked even more perplexed, then vanished.

· I saw Jennifer Love Hewitt coming out of Madison, a boutique across from Fred Segal on Melrose, yesterday (Monday). She was leaving the store and hopped into a waiting BMW. Jennifer looked hot wearing jeans and a
sweater showing her stomach and, um.... her breasts looked totally amazing.

· I wandered into the remodeled Ralph's on 3rd and La Brea at around 3 pm yesterday (Monday the 21st), and got stuck behind two very tall black women. One said, "Did you hear about Tracy Morgan," and, as I hadn't, I moved in closer. In fact, I moved ahead of them and turned around. It was Tyra Banks and friend. They looked at me (in fairness, looked down towards me) and I moved on. Miss Tyra was not wearing much makeup, and looked a bit tired. I must say, though, that she has a tremendously attractive bottom. I never learned about Tracy Morgan.

· saw tracy morgan of SNL/crank yankers fame with the wife at the Ralph's in the Beverly Connection on Monday. she was super nice, and did all of the talking. he was quiet as a mouse, but looked very cute in his yankees jacket and cap. the only item in their (full) cart i remember is a bag of ore ida frozen fries. delicious.

· i spotted rob reiner walking across beverly drive into nate 'n al's this morning (2/16). he was sporting some sort of oversized light colored denim button down (which i found a bit disturbing and confusing) with an otherwise normal outfit. he is a large, large man. he was with a woman (i assume she was his wife if he is married). she was thin with brown hair and dressed pretty conservatively in comparison to his atrocity of a shirt. they were coming out of the valet lot across the street and i knew right away that they had to be heading to the deli. i would love to watch that man eat deli food. i bet he can do some serious damage.

· 24 Hour Fitness at the Arclight is the new Hollywood Canteen or the Brown Derby. Even though i haven't spotted such high wattage starts as Vince Vaughn and his nipples, it's been a veritable who's who of B and C list celebrities as of late. Just saw Sex in the City's Willie Garson there doing the ellipse machine and spotted Elizah Dushku last night, looking good. Not as good as when i saw her at crunch a few years back, asking the trainer if she had to give up smoking or if it was an option to get back into Buffy guest starring shape. but my biggest D list sighting as of late was the former AI host/snarky loser, Brian Dunkelman, working his triceps one saturday night. my friend and i recognized him right away and i know he knew that we knew he was former AI host/snarky loser, Brian Dunkelman. Looked kinda cute in a former host kind of way.

· In a rare sojourn away from the east side, I saw Kyle MacLachlan today in his Mercedes cruising down Beverly towards the Beverly Center. He has a weird shaped head. Then at Urth on Melrose there was Nicole Richie or someone else papanazi worthy (honestly the little blonde things all look the same in those retarded Chanel sunglasses.) Going unnoticed was Orlando Jones with maybe the cutest dog, a short bulldog who refused to
pass by the tables until he was sure there was no food to steal. He's doing a pilot with Martin Landau... that's cool. He should definitely stop working with the Duchovny.

· Spotted Kevin Smith stone-cold lunching outside the Griddle on Sunset. Looking as dorky-cool as ever and dining with the wife. Clerks is the best movie ever.

· Saw Anna Nicole Smith at Casa Vega last night, dining with two guys, neither of whom was Bobby Trendy. She has a rocking body, that's for sure, and was nicely groomed, but still gave off the impression of being a skanky ho.

· Hosting cynical out-of-town guests desperate to come away from their trip to "sunny" L.A. with a celebrity sighting, spotted Jane Leeves at American Rag on Saturday with her husband and child. Of course no one looks great
on a rainy, gloomy day, and Jane Leeves was no exception. I didn't see that she cracked a smile once; she did NOT look happy to be there.

· Last week, Thursday night, went into Cafe Sushi next to the Beverly Center and shagged out at one of the tables with a bear and mustache - but looking not a day older than 19 1/2 was Luke Perry along with a couple of friends. Still scrawny, still dressing like a disaffected Gap ad.

· Saw Ian Ziering of "90210"-fame renting skis at Sport Chalet in the Beverly Connection today (Tuesday). He was better looking and less weathered than I expected. I was a little surprised that he didn't think to raid Steve Sanders' section in the prop closet back in the day for his own set of skis instead of renting them like the little people. Perhaps someone can place a call to Tori Spelling for some of daddy's castoffs for good ol' Steve?

· Outside Katsu-ya on a Saturday night, super-thin guy in many layers of expensive but casual clothing, pacing and chatting on his cell phone. Sure, he's way thinner than I pictured and sure, I hadn't actually pictured him since I was twelve, but I was sure it was none other than Parker Lewis aka I know My First Name is Steven aka Sleazy Lawyer in the
Later Years of 90210 aka Corin Nemec. I noted my sighting aloud, thereby causing an irreparable rift in my party of six, half of whom thought I was insane, one of whom was totally with me, and the others just didn't care. I'll say this: it was him, and he looked very good. So good that he looked like part of that population of men who always look good. You know what I'm saying? I think you do.

· Marilu Henner in the checkout line at the Whole Foods on Santa Monica Blvd. and Fairfax — she looked stunning; I did a double take. I didn't get a chance to see what she was buying, but I did linger around the produce aisle to get a better second look.

· Must be a mad tv-type day (Last Saturday). I was driving down Sunset Blvd. and I saw Bobby Lee in front of Comedy Store, smoking a cigarette and posing for a picture with fans. then went to Blockbuster (I know they will still find a way to fuck us all on late fees) and saw Ike Barinholtz with two stupidly hot, Eastern-Bloc looking girls. He looked content.