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We know it's old news, but yes, we've heard (and if we don't post something about it, we'll keep getting e-mail): Fred Durst is suing Gawker Media (and various other entities, including, we think, the internet itself and Johnny Five from Short Circuit) for being among the first eight dozen or so websites to briefly spread his leaked sex video. The lawyers are asking for $80 million; here's how we think that breaks down:

· For thinking that Durst's "O-face" is patently hilarious: $40,000,000
· Not finding Durst's request for his partner to "touch my balls and my ass" sufficiently titillating: $39,999,995.05
· Upon hearing the background music in the video, remarking that Wes Borland was clearly the true genius behind the Limp Bizkit sound: $4.95

A more-or-less official response from Gawker is here. Thus spake the mothership.