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Once again, the incredible volume of your responses has completely overwhelmed our inbox, so it's time to end the game and post your guesses. Quickly, run naked down the halls of One Adorable Blind Vice:

Ted sez: "Okay, sugar-muffins, the only reason this one's in the Vice section is because until quite recently, Toothy Tile was dating his superpopular, superannoyingly perfect girlfriend. Not boyfriend. Which, if you ask this old gossip whore, is the classification Tile would prefer his significant others be filed under in the very near future.." Read the item.

You say: Your guesses are after the jump.

You say: In a race that was just too close to call, we're going to have to make this a split decision. Nearly half of you scoffed at how easy the item is, then made overconfident wagers involving your mother's eyes, sock-eating, or a strange combination of both, and shouted, "Orlando Bloom"! Recent break-up? Check. Dimpled, annoying ex-girlfriend? Check.

The other half of you threw back your heads, let loose with a derisive laugh at the utter lack of difficulty of this week's item, and cackled, "Chris Klein! I'm sure of it! Is Ted even trying anymore?" Let's see...Recent break-up> Uh huh. Dimpled, annoying ex-girlfriend? In your opinion, certainly. We could never be annoyed by Katie Holmes' adorable perfection. You fuck with Joey, you get the horns, you dig?

Now that it's settled, a reader comment: "Toothy Tile...'Tile' isn't even a name. Maybe next week's item will feature 'Lusty Linoleum' or 'Busty Breadbox'." If we may be so bold as to speak on behalf of this century's most devious gossip mind: Touché, pussycat.

You also say: A few of you guessed this actor, or that actor, or The Actor Who Shall Not Be Named, but a handful offered up Jake Gyllenhaal's name. But this was a very, very distant third-place finish. The Dreamy Eyes shall live to fight another day.

And The Andy Dick Memorial “You Also Say” Item Goes To: Andy Dick, mainly by default. Perhaps a stronger candidate was lost somewhere in the torrent of Klein/Bloom guesses, but remember this: It's always Andy's to lose.

Thanks for playing!