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A reader just forwarded us this breaking! news! e-mail detailing Faye Dunaway's fender-bender, a Mercedes-dinging tragedy that happened virtually moments ago:

Thurs 4/21 4:07 pm:
Faye Dunaway has just gotten into a car accident in front of the building I work in. We know it's her because my boss has busted out the binoculars. She is driving an older 2 seater Mercedes & it looks like she smashed into a couple who were driving a Honda. While calmly waiting for the cops, Faye was seen munching on a take-out salad while an obnoxious co-worker of mine walked by and shot some paparazzi-style snaps.You never know who'll you'll run in to, here in Hollywood. So exciting.

This e-mail was immediately followed by one submitted by another reader, confirming the inherent newsworthiness of the first:

Apparantly, according to the geniuses at ABC 7, Faye Dunaway got into an accident in her black Mercedes Benz on La Cienaga. She seems fine. She was wearing a white shirt and a straw hat. It was a single car accident. But it is a slow news day so it led the 4:30 news with a copter shot tracking the Benz being taken up La Cienaga on a flatbed. No Starlets were in the vicinity.

Defamer: Bringing you completely useless, The Starlet-related traffic news since roughly 4:07 p.m.