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Wherein we invite our readers to pan for blind item gold in the auriferous streams of humpy E! gossip-prospector Ted Casablanca. This week's offering stars a semihetero hunk's horny, yet misguided, attempts at penis-vagina contact. Plunge down the mine shaft of One Four-Footed Blind Vice:

Ted sez: "Glistening Gunther, like Naughty Nina last week, happens to be one of my faves. He's a more than decent actor (quite unlike N2), but Gunther's personal life leaves much to be desired. Like his ability—or lack thereof—to seduce women. Sally Ridden is as red hot as they come, career-wise. Man-wise, it's a diff story but not really the point of this Blind tale. So, G.G. is in one of his moods, which means he thinks he's actually straight for a day. He calls up S.R., asks for a date. " Read the item.

You say: Send your guesses to defamer[AT]gmail.com, and put "blind" in the subject line. We'll post the responses later today.