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Wherein we invite our readers to put on their comically oversized rubber pants and wade into humpy E! gossip columnist Ted Casablanca's creek and use their bare hands to grab hold of the the blind item fish he's stocked there. This week, a cheating husband is unknowingly being cuckolded by his secretly Sapphic spouse. (Oh, the joys of alliteration!) Feel the burn of One Predictable Blind Vice:

Ted sez: "Dudes'll do anything to get their romantic conquest(s) o' the moment into the sack. Trust me, despite all the frosted hair, I am one. I know of what I horn dog speak. So there, at his movie-star home, kissing and writhing in his movie-star bedroom, is Donkey Dickey. With Donkey is not his movie-star wife but his fill-in conjugal partner, a pretty girl picked up at one of those trendy watering holes." Read the item.

UPDATE: You say: Your guesses are posted!