Lindsay Lohan's Daddy Issues Grow More Complicated

Lindsay Lohan's father was sentenced to prison today in New York, receiving 1 1/3 to 4 years for a medley of crimes, including the highly entertaining (though, sadly, highly illegal) footwear-based assault of his brother-in-law. Lohan's publicist is secretly thrilled, knowing that she can now abandon her usual arsenal of fake illness-based excuses for the actress's antics in favor of ones rooted in the stresses of having her father in jail.