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• This would explain why the hollandaise sauce had a little extra kick; four employees were fired from Bistro Du Vent for having a wild orgy on the top of the bar. [Page Six]
• Mary-Kate Olsen — we know her as "MK," because we've got our finger on the pulse — might be modeling for Calvin Klein. Clothes, we think. [Scoop]
• Justin Timberlake wins court case against British tabloid. What, with this and his sudden ability to grow a beard, this kid, he's going places. [R&M (third item)]
• Jerry Seinfeld on a kid-every-two-years pace. He now has enough children to write a wacky sitcom about their romantic foibles and the little things in life that nobody ever notices, like why Grape Nuts are neither grapes nor nuts. [Page Six]
• If you write about something weird that Liza Minnelli does, does it even count as gossip? Or is it simply the way of the universe? [Lowdown]