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Wherein we invite our to readers tug at the bill of their caps, dig into the batter's box, and take their hacks at the blind item spitballs hurled by humpy E! gossip southpaw Ted Casablanca. This week, Ted peeks out into the October sun, sees his shadow, and retreats back into his gossip-hole, ensuring another six weeks of supposedly-straight-actors-are-actually-gay items. Adjust your package and have a go at One Here-We-Go-Again Blind Vice:

Ted sez: "Ya think Toothy Tile is the only dude out there doing high jumps over the sexuality fence? Uh-uh. Chump Dump is up to his girlie hairdo in politically motivated mushy goings-on. See, C.D. had a red-hot career at one time. Making the real girlies go gaga over his supposedly boyish charm (little did the screaming fans know it was their older bros at home whom Chump would have preferred see squealing with wide-eyed delight). Now he's notsohotso." Read the item.

You say: Send your guesses to defamer[AT]gmail.com and put "blind" in the subject line. We'll post your responses later today.