In this edition of Gawker Stalker: Sienna Miller has some choice words for the paparazzi, Natalie Portman, Dakota Fanning shoe shopping, Scarlett Johansson and Josh Hartnett (ed: Scarnett?), Ashton and Demi, new Bond Daniel Craig, Paul Giamatti, Liv Tyler, Kirsten Dunst, Uma Thurman, Minnie Driver, Richard Gere, Carey Lowell, Lou Reed, David Bowie, Lili Tyler, Terry Gross, Elvis Costello, Kyra Sedgwick, Chris Martin, John Cusack, Bette Midler, Ben Affleck, Keri Russell, Claire Danes, A-Rod, Annie Leibowitz, Petra Nemcova, Julianne Moore, Bono, Billy Crystal, Dermot Mulroney, Catherine Keener, Jason Schwartzman, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Nick Nolte, John Waters, Donald Trump, Oliver Stone, Bob Costas, Hayden Christensen, Sarah Vowell, M.J. Blige, Russ and Kimora Simmons, Al Sharpton, Ice T and Coco, Rachel Hunter, Matthew Perry, Lisa Bonet, Cam'ron and Farnsworth Bentley, Mike Skinner from The Streets, Jon Brion, Joe Jackson, Billy Joel, Scott Speedman, Bridget Hall, and Lauren Hutton.

Sunday, 10/16 I was riding my roommate's classy BMX bike past Barney's co-op around noon or so and i saw a visibly shaken and stirred sienna miller being chased by about a dozen paparazzi. As she hurriedly crossed the street, a paparazzi caused this guy to wreck his bike and she yelled, "fuck off, you guys" with a thick British accent. She looked boho but good as they continued to chase her down the street.

I was walking past my mecca of smoked fish this past Friday and saw a shornheaded pixie walking ahead of me with an older guy (uncle type) and a younger girl (cousin type). As I l slowed my roll in front of Russ and Daughters I looked closer and saw that it was Queen Amidala herself, Natalie Portman. I heard her comment on how great the fish was in there and was about to chime in the conversation but unfortunately I was with a ladyfriend and totally missed my one chance and working my way in to the sweet sweet embrace of Natalie Portman. If you read this baby, call me!

I saw Dakota Fanning on Sunday at Bloomies in better shoes - with a entourage of older women, most likely her mother and others. She was rushing around trying on every ballet flat and we were both eyeing the same Marc Jacobs pair. She was taller than I expected and seemed sort of snobby, and carrying one of those huge bright Juicy Couture bags. She wasn't very cute, hopefully she will come out of the awkward stage of adolescence okay.

So it was Friday afternoon, I was exhausted after a week of work and rain, and got a seat on the Brooklyn bound f train. I glanced up from my book at w 4th street and noticed a very tall attractive guy with facial hair and a hat. He was with a shorter girl with a scarf around her head and full pouty lips... very distinctive full pouty lips... and then, as they walked out through the open doors, I had a flash of recognition— it was Scarlett Johansson and Josh Hartnett. No one else seemed to take any notice, but my mouth hung open as I was left craning my neck, desperate to catch another glimpse of them in the rush hour crowds.

Friday night (10/14), we saw Ashton and Demi at Sweet Charity, trying to be inconspicuous. Ashton was wearing sunglasses and a hooded sweatshirt. After the first act, the entire orchestra section turned towards them to see what they were going to do next.

Saw Daniel Craig walking up 14th St. towards 5th Ave. this morning sporting a newsboy cap. He was holding hands with a woman who was definitely not Sienna Miller. He is one good-looking man. His eyes are insanely blue.

Spotted outside the Carroll St. stop on the F line, Saturday 10/15: Paul Giamatti, looking like he was waiting for someone, pushing an empty baby stroller. He was looking comfortably disheveled, as one would expect, but his hair (or what's left of it) had grown a little longer perhaps than it should.

I saw Liv Tyler with her baby on the corner of Bleecker and S. 7th Ave. today (10/16). She was out for a stroll looking a little frumpy. No make up and sweats. Her lips were unmistakable though. Also saw Kirsten Dunst jogging in the same neighborhood. She was wearing black wind pants and a black hoody with the hood up even though it was pretty warm. Her cheeks were flushed, and I noticed how cute she looked before I realized who it was.

I saw Uma Thurman last night outside my apartment. 10/12. I was coming home and I noticed her from half a block away because of how tall and unbelievably gorgeous she is. Was with her boyfriend who looked older/not as cute in person.

Friday, 10/14: Minnie Driver jumped in front of me on the escalator at Whole Foods w/ her take-out containers of salad and berries- tall, pretty, she looked cute in a sort of vintagey/boho get up, but seemed somewhat intense/worried- maybe she was afraid she'd be short of cash when she got to check out (I am still haunted by the report of the low balance on her ATM receipt several months ago); isn't she sort of Barbados-ian (she grew up there...little known fact) royalty, or something? Surely some family money? Just concerned.

Someone broke a celebrity pi ata over the audience at last night's fabulous Antony and the Johnsons concert at Carnegie Hall. Waiting in line to pick up my ticket, I realize I'm standing next to Richard Gere and wife, Carey Lowell. Wow, I think—excellent sighting. She's lovely, and surprisingly much taller than Gere, who was wearing a baseball cap but not as if he was trying to hide. Then I take my nosebleed seat in the last row of the balcony when this guy appears out of nowhere, hands me and 3 others tickets for the 2nd row orchestra instead, and disappears. I am so stunned and baffled I don't even get a chance to thank him, this bearer of supreme benevolence. That's when the night truly turned awe-inspiring, as, on my way to my 2nd row seat just feet from the stage, I pass Lou Reed and David Bowie—still sexy as hell—chatting it up in the center aisle amidst industry minions. I can barely see straight in my excitement, but as I take my seat and try to casually arrange my coat, I also spot Laurie Anderson, Kate Winslet, and her husband, Sam Mendes. Now I've lost all composure. Just before the show begins, Rufus Wainwright slinks by and has a brief exchange with Kate across 3 rows of eager ears (wishes her a Happy Birthday). Halfway through the fantastic show, Antony invites the legendary but frail Jimmy Scott onstage for a brief but riveting set, and then Lou Reed joins him for an encore. Amazing. Filing out after the show, I also spy a very petite and much lovelier in real life Lili Taylor of Six Feet Under. My brain is still buzzing from the multiple thrills, not least of which was the music....

First, in train to NY from Philly, say local hero Terry Gross, who sadly had to listen to the ass next to me talk loudly on his cell for almost two hours. Then, at the Manhattan Vintage Clothing & Textile show saw Elvis Costello! Also Kyra Sedgwick, but she didn't have the same effect for me.

Just saw Chris Martin (sans Gwyneth and Apple) getting some lunch at Bazzini in Tribeca. He was quite unshaven, wearing a black jacket, army green pants, white sneakers- looked chill and plain, pretty unrecognizable. While I was on the sandwich line, he wandered around the drink fridge and came back to the line empty handed. Right when we walked by each other, he looked at me for a quick second. It was probably because I was sort of in his way, my bad. He ordered and started to wander around by the fridge again.

I was walking along Central Park South around 5 on Sunday when I passed an unmistakable John Cusack looking like a schlub in black cargo pants and an oversized hooded sweatshirt and carrying a huge tote bag while talking to a woman. He was wearing dark glasses, but I would recognize those lips, that jet-black hair and that voice anywhere.

Saw Bette Midler yesterday (10/16) standing in line at Whole Foods in Columbus Circle. She was petite, blond, and wearing a bad pair of grey sweatpants. The odd thing was that NO ONE recognized her and she wasn't even incognito. And let's be honest, anyone who has been to that Whole Foods knows how many people are in line at a time...

Spotted Ben Affleck at EJ's on Sixth Avenue while eating a last-minute pre-Yom Kipur meal. He was wearing a big puffy jacket and baseball cap and reading the New York Times (would have guessed he was a Post man). He passed me to hit the bathroom and, my goodness, he is tall. Very nice skin too. Then, while slogging my way to the 2/3 (so OVER the rain), I came face-to-face with Keri Russell heading south on Seventh Avenue in front of Saint Vincent's. She was carrying some dry cleaning and was positively radiant.

I saw Claire Danes at Happy Ending in Chinatown Saturday night. She was in one of the backrooms downstairs with a group of people and was cozying up to some guy that didn't appear to be anyone famous...no more Crudup?

A-Rod at Cain 10/14 - sticking out like a sore thumb. I think the huge security man hovering over his table all night gave it away?

Friday October 14th. Famed portrait photographer Annie Leibowitz sitting behind me at the estate auction of another famed photographer, Richard Avedon. I believe she purchased a simple 19th century pine table.

Wednesday, 10/12 saw Sports Illustrated cover girl Petra Nemcova at Bao 111 in the East Village. She was with a party of ten, including Jamison Ernst of Yellow Fever. She was very pretty, but not at all rail thin. She went outside on her cell phone, crying for a long time. So sad to be so pretty

10/15 afternoon coulda sword I saw Julianne Moore in front of coffee shop . looked great, albeit tiny. No husband. Frankly, i think she was eyeballing me.

City of Blinding Celebrities (I Have Found What I m Looking For): Taking guests from the UK into Central Park on Saturday 10/15 to enjoy the rain-free, beautiful day, proudly sporting my Vertigo concert t-shirt purchased on Tuesday night, and who should be heading out of the Ramble in our direction but a familiar-looking woman and a hooded, black-clad gent. Friend jokes, looks like Bono and as we shuffle past realize in shock that it WAS Bono, sans glasses and glancing furtively out of his deep hood at his wife and perhaps nearby children. A celebrity-induced brain freeze prevented me from doubling back to follow in his elevated-shoe footsteps. Looked a bit knackered following his fifth show this month at MSG but who could fault him after the best concert ever??

I saw Billy Crystal with family at the Apple Store in SoHo on Sunday. Billy, wife, and daughter were checking out new Powerbooks, while I groaned at $29 for an iPod case. I'm not sure why they'd need to go to the Apple Store for that though—isn't the academy giving away Powerbooks in their Oscars goody bags yet?

Spotted Dermot Mulroney having brunch at blue mill tavern yesterday (10/16) - looks like he and Catherine Keener are headed for divorce, as he was wedding ring-less. Also saw Jason Schwartzman trying on (womens) pea coats at j crew, on prince street. As always, he appeared to be much shorter in person.

I saw Maggie Gyllenhaal last night (10/16) at Gramercy Tavern. She was having dinner with a grandma-type person very cute. When they got up to leave, the older lady was walking slowly with the help of a walker while Maggie walked behind, which allowed everyone in the restaurant to get a good, long look at her. For the record, she is quite tall, and she was carrying an Alexander McQueen Hitchock bag in a delicious shade of red. Lucky girl.

Saw Nick Nolte on the roof of the Delancey. For some reason, he was just sitting and chatting with a group of young, frat boy-ish guys. My friends and I were pretty drunk and I asked one of them to go verify it was Nick Nolte by asking him if he was in "Point Break" with Keanu Reeves. Too bad I didn't realize Gary Busey was Keanu's co-star in that classic piece of cinema until she came back...

Saw John Waters gallery hopping Friday night. Looked weathered, and the rain wasn't helping.

On Friday, October 14th, I saw a somber Donald Trump exiting the 7:20 PM showing of Capote at the Loews Kips Bay. He really needs to do something about that hair, as it now appears to glow in the dark.

Sunday night at P.J. Clarke's Chris Albrecht (CEO) of HBO did a double take when Oliver Stone and family walked in to enjoy burgers and shepherd's pie. Later Mr. Albrecht caught the attention of Bob Costas while the White Sox won the American League.

Saw Hayden Christensen, burrito in hand, getting into a red SUV on Broadway near 11th. He looks like he's a member of Yale's Skulls and Bones.

Okay, so maybe this is a little obscure, but here goes: Sarah Vowell (The Incredibles, NYTimes Op-Ed - not THAT obscure!) taking in the 6:30 show of "The Squid and the Whale" (great movie, btw) on Wed. 10/12 at the Angelica with an older, balder, taller male companion, both of them looking like normal people. I guess I was the only one who recognized La Vowell.

M.J. Blige's private "retrospective" show and reception last night at Rose Theater in Lincoln Center provided ample gawking. Besides Mary herself, who (with her platinum tresses and SKINNY ass) looked like a cross between Tina Turner and Whitney, there was Russ Simmons (sans Kimora) in his characteristic blazer and striped sweater a la Sesame St's "Ernie" pressing palms with Al Sharpton and a polished Ice-T with wife "model" Coco. Ice & Mrs. T could be seen later gettin down third row center — the Mrs. Shaking her unmistakably silicon heiney.

In midtown for conference, staying at the Flatotel which is the stupidest name for anything, ever, and I'm down in the basement (not looking for the medicine) to use one of the two computers so I can log on to the "internet," and I have to ask the woman sitting at the front one to move a bit so I can squeeze past her. She is cordial, we undress each other with our eyes for a brief, intense moment, when I realize it's Rachel Hunter. Thanks to many hours spent reading this virtual rag (Gawker, not Rachel Hunter, she is fully corporeal), I know the proper protocol is to remain nonplussed. Meanwhile, she continues yakking on the phone in her Aussie accent about the weather. Fuck, celebrities are
boring. She looked fantastic, though.

Went to Lotus on Thursday. Totally pretentious club but the music was good and the people cool. Matthew Perry was there too but he spent most of the night hiding out in the lounge where there was an art exhibit-type thing going on. He seemed nice and even did a little Chandler dance. Either he's a "close talker" or he was seriously hitting on the hot waitress. I don't know if Lotus does this all the time or if it was for the art exhibit but there was free stuff everywhere in the lounge. Makes you feel better to get free stuff after spending twenty bucks on a drink.

Saw Lisa Bonet at the Dead Can Dance show at Radio City Music Hall on October 8th. She looked gorgeous, with long dreads and a long black lace-up ensemble. She is petite, but looks exactly the same, still a beauty. My female lesbian friend said that she made eye contact with her in the ladies room She seemed to be alone, and wandered around in the lobby pre-show.

Cam'ron and Farnsworth Bentley in the VIP area of Spirit. Get it Rocafella.

Saw Mike Skinner from The Streets on the LES Friday night (10/14). He was crazy nice and more than willing to entertain all of the stupid, drunken questions we all slurred and stammered in his general direction

So was that Jon Brion in the deli next to Arlene's Grocery on Stanton St on 7pmish Sunday evening, as I bought my Sparks and he bought his snack bar? And was THAT tall, dapper, black-bedecked Joe Jackson on W. Broadway on Saturday afternoon strolling down the avenue as I wandered aloud "See the pretty pretty pretty girls in the street"?

Billy Joel (10/14) sitting on a bench in front of Nook in MidtownWest talking to a 30 something brunette who seemed to be reveling in the fact that everyone passing was noticing him and wondering who she was. She was very aware of passer bys where he, understandably, seemed very used to it.

Saw Scott Speedman on 5th Ave, near 19th St. on Sunday at around 2pm. He had to be pointed out to me, as usual. He was wearing big ski goggle-looking glasses and looked like he was wearing powder.
Saw Bridget Hall (the model) last night at The Park on 10th Ave and 17th St. She was with some other people. had no makeup on, still looked pretty.

Lauren Hutton in Noho Star, Sunday. She was alone reading the "week in review" section of NY Times. Wearing sweats but still looking good.