In this walk the walk, stalk the stalk edition: La Lohan and half a cheeseburger, Andre Balasz and Uma Thurman, Luke Wilson and a girl with bangs, Maggie Gyllenhaal and Peter Sarsgaard, Lauren Bush, Zach Braff, Ed Burns, Sigourney Weaver, Philip Seymour Hoffman, Jason Schwartzman, Liev Schreiber, Liam Neeson, Zooey Deschanel (maybe), Rick Moranis (definitely), Alan Cumming, Rachel Dratch, Giovanni Ribisi, Juliana Margulies, Talib Kweli, Scott Speedman, Danny Bonaduce, John Waters, Debbie Harry, Theodora Richards, Alec Baldwin, Al Roker, Pat O Brien, and Chris Burke goes on with life.

Sat a couple of tables away from Lindsay Lohan last night (Tues.) at Fanelli's. She was wrapped up and wearing a hat but you could tell she was scarily thin. She ate half a cheeseburger and complained about stomach pains. Jeez. Also still seemed to have a nasty cough. Damn the asthma! No defamatory Scarlett graffiti in the bathroom after she left, sadly.

Was holding court at Elaine s last night (it involves a lot of ascot wearing and punctuating my points by tapping a cane on the floor) and spotted Uma Thurman enjoying a dinner with boyfriend, Andre Balazs, and two other dudes. She ate her entr e and then hit the bathroom for such a long duration that she must have either been making Kill Bill Volume 3 or filling her sizeable nostrils with all sorts of bad things. Anyhow, it was Andre s birthday and the staff sang to him. He looked happy; Uma looked kind of embarrassed. Oh, and she s just as tall/hot in real life as she is in the many nude scenes she filmed before motherhood ruined her nip-naps.

Can't believe the person who noticed the Laurens missed the much hotter stalk of Luke Wilson! I know he is starting to be ubiquitous in these here parts but he was also at the Rusty Truck show on Saturday night at The Living Room. He came in near the beginning of the show with a semi hot chick with major bangs going on. They stood in the back and he seemed to be enjoying the show she seemed to be having trouble standing up under all that hair. But he was nice to the randoms that approached and as he walked out people kept commenting on the guy who got his arm bit off in anchor man... totally forgot he was even in it.

Last Friday (1/27) I was having lunch at the bus stop cafe on Hudson and Bethune in le village when Maggie Gyllenhaal walked by with Peter Sarsgaard (wow that's a lot of double a's). Anyway, they looked pretty chummy for two people who are supposed to be broken up. Anyway, they were just kinda mosey-ing along, enjoying the unseasonably warm weather.

I think I saw Lauren Bush at the Whitney on Friday night. I saw her on the Bluemner and Tuttle floors. She was wearing a horizontal nautical stripe shirt and tight faded blue jeans taught around the ankles. Sneakers flatsoled. (The twill was diagonal, Thank God.) She radiated decency, totally unflakey. She was taking the art very seriously. It looked like she liked the art but was trying to like it more. Classic good breeding. She took the stairs.

Zach Braff, looking kinda sleepy, in oversized, reflective aviators, walking up Sixth Avenue toward the Park. Was by himself, and nobody recognized him. Had I not been on the phone, I like to think I would have said, "What's up, Largeman?" but I probably wouldn't have. He's hot, nicely built, and now I hate Mandy Moore even more than I did after watching Chasing Liberty on a hungover Sunday.

I saw Ed Burns on the corner of 14th Street and 6th Avenue late Monday afternoon. At first I just thought he was a cute guy, and it took a couple of long seconds of (probably fairly indiscreet) staring to realize why his face was so familiar. He looked great very well-groomed but was wearing unfortunate jeans that bunched unattractively around his ankles over too-white sneakers. Shouldn't the spouse of a supermodel be a bit more style conscious?

Saw Sigourney Weaver this morning (1/31) on the corner of 49th/1st. She was with an older man looking a bit frazzled and running to catch a cab. Not quite as commanding a presence as she has on film, but certainly a striking woman.

Spotted Philip Seymour Hoffman (this may sound crazy, but he was lookin' kinda good that night!) smoking' a cig outside of Deerhoof for The Public Sings show last night. Got a little second-hand smoke action.

Well I was disappointed to see there had already been one recently reported but I took my visiting mother to the MOMA in midtown and she was in one of her perky, lovin-life moods and dragged me into the next-door gift shop for the Museum of American Folk Art on 53rd. My annoyance was alleviated when a diminutive guy in hole-y jeans and a vintage basketball jacket walked in. The size (he is tiny!) combined with the mole confirmed that it was in fact Jason Schwartzman. I was also certain because his female accompaniment caught me amidst the shocked recognition. She smiled sweetly at me, not at all embarrassed. I guess she witnesses it a lot, and I might as well have "Wes Anderson freak who watches Rushmore every six months" stamped on my forehead. She was demurely stylish in all navy and subtly pretty. I waited for him to speak, but he very silently investigated all the various knick-knacks. Other recent spectator was right, he looks exactly as he did in Huckabees and Shopgirl.

Last night (1/31) 9:20pm in front of Au Bon Pain on Broadway/Great Jones saw Liev Schreiber looking very scruffy with his face fur, talking to a very pretty twenty something Phoebe Cates look-a-like.

While dining at Cafe Luxembourg on the Upper West Side last evening (1/31), I spotted a gaunt looking Mr. Oskar Schindler himself, Liam Neeson, at the bar knocking back drinks alone, oblivious to the Jewish Yuppie crowd around him that were descended from his characters "List". Whilst Mr. Neeson works his whole older Irish man hot look on screen, in real life he looks/dresses like he is channeling a late 70s rock star...angry sullen looks coupled with skinny tapered jeans. My boyfriend walked his petite Dominican mother near Mr. Neeson (who is very tall), she turns around (every obviously) and says "Aye Dios Mio". He was not amused.

I was forced to take a long detour from the 77th St. entrance at the Natural History Museum to the 81st St. entrance because Paramount is filming its John Lennon movie all around there (all the way to the Dakota). Walking out down Central Park West they had a bunch of cool old cars probably used for props. Saw what looked like Zooey Deschanel on set, but wasn't sure had crossed the street already. Half a block later I pass a short, scruffy Rick Moranis walking uptown.

I wanted to say I was standing outside Rififi last weekend and the delightful Alan Cumming was walking by with his tiny little dog. He was with another man who was commenting on some of the window arrangements of a thrift store. He seemed pretty relaxed walking his dog with his fabulous friend (who seemed content holding his dog strapped to his chest like a baby). Couldn't tell whether or not the two were sporting Alan's pun-y business venture Cumming fragrance.

Tiny little SNLer Rachel Dratch was one of the stranded masses on my 1/29 Jet Blue flight from Boston to JFK. The flight left at 11 p.m. instead of 8:50, but Rachel seemed like she was in an ok mood, clutching her blue parka and listening patiently to some guy who wouldn't stop talking about his job as a teacher. (He advised her to "look to the middle schoolers" for some comedy.) She talked about how she still gets lost in the West Village and in Boston, thanks to the crazy non-grid streets. She was coming back from a visit to friends in Boston, and also mentioned that this may be her last season of SNL. She's seriously 5 feet tall tops, and was wearing a very fuzzy white fleece.

Walking down Hudson near Tribeca, spotted Giovanni Ribisi solo.

Juliana Margulies got her nails done next to me on Sunday she made the pedicure woman put her socks back on for her. Possibly this is because her nails were wet or possibly because she hates Koreans.

Saw Talib Kweli sitting by himself on the L train, listening to an iPod and rapping out loud. It was unclear if it was to his own music, but he was definitely playing one-handed air piano.

Saw Scott Speedman coming out of Whole Foods at Union Square Saturday night. He was wearing a backpack and looked like he was in a hurry I guess he's trying to re-live his "college days."

Saw Danny Bonaduce sans wife and VH1 cameras at the Duplex in the village. He didn't sing but seemed to enjoy the music as well as the conversation with the 2 guys and 2 girls he was with.

Last night (1/31) went to a party at Happy Valley. Saw the guest of honor, John Waters. He looks the same as he does on TV, not sure if that is good or bad. Also, crossed paths with Debbie Harry Blondie is a tiny little woman. On the way out I overheard Kim the lesbian model from America s Next Top Model say the party was lame on her cell. Maybe because she got there right when the free booze stopped flowing.

Saw Theodora Richards looking hot as ever at Balthazar last night (1/31). I normally don't think she looks like anything special but last night she looked smokin' very rocker chic in all black, super skinny jeans and messy blonde hair. She's only 5'7" (I've seen her comp card from IMG) so she must have been wearing some very high heels under those jeans.

Alec Baldwin in a gray suit, with 50's style black frame glasses, looking very fit, not as tall as I expected. Phenomenal hair. Talking to a younger, bundled-up dude about a play (perhaps hottie co-star from Baldwin's new show? I chose subtlety over staring and therefore will never know).

Celebrating Chinese New Year with a little Dim Sum at Our Place (84/2nd), spotted Al Roker with his young (4-5yrs old) adorable daughter. My friend tried to start a convo with him while he tried to delicately squeeze past the back of my chair, dripping rainwater on me in the process. Resisted the urge to ask him how the weather was.

2/1 I just saw Pat O'Brien enter an NYU building on Washington Square Park. His hair loss is accelerating, but otherwise the old man looked pretty decent in a long black coat and signature glasses.

This might be a tad obscure but any aficionados of warm, family TV will remember the peppy, life-affirming family show "Life Goes On," starring the differently-abled Chris Burke. Well, boyfriend isn't getting much in the way of residuals, I guess, cause I spotted him aboard the cross-town Houston Street bus last night. Still, he looked put together a nice, pressed suit and styled hair.