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The Anthony Pellicano Wiretapping Trial of the Century has finally put its indictments where its mouth is, charging professional eavesdropper to the stars Pellicano, an ex-LAPD cop, and five others with racketeering (a PDF of the entire document is available here). As was feared by many, and anxiously anticipated by many more, the indictment names a long list of celebrity clients who fell victim to Pellicano's allegedly crooked surveillance services, Sylvester Stallone and Gary Shandling among them:

Pellicano pleaded not guilty to the charges today, and remained in custody. No trial date has been set.


Pellicano and his associates, including former LAPD Officer Mark Arneson, allegedly wire-tapped actor Sylvester Stallone and accessed confidential police records for prominent people and celebrities, including comedians Garry Shandling and Kevin Nealon, New York Times reporter Bernard Weinraub and former Los Angeles Times reporter Anita Busch, the 60-page indictment said.

"Defendant Pellicano was responsible for securing clients who were willing and able to pay large sums for the purpose of obtaining personal information of a confidential, embarrassing, or incriminating nature regarding other individuals, including opponents or witnesses in criminal or civil litigation who became the enterprise's investigative charges," the indictment alleged.

The charges stem from a three-year FBI investigation into Pellicano's alleged use of wiretaps and other illegal tactics, authorities confirmed Friday.

Based on a cursory Defamer legal analysis of the indictments, we have reached the following conclusion: There appears to be high levels of paranoia among Hollywood's aging, perma-tanned, skirt-chasing, little-work-around-the- eyes-and-neck set. As for who we want to see taking the stand, a quick office poll resulted in zero votes for Nealon ("Like we need to see him trot out the Hans n' Franz bullshit for the swearing in," a voter replied) and Stallone ("Please, the guy's so desperate for a comeback, he'll probably storm the hearings," says one comment card), and a nearly unanimous "yea" for Shandling, who's "worth the price of admission purely for the inevitable court stenographer come-ons alone," remarked a particularly astute intern. Developing...