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Vin Diesel may play the clown at his premieres, but on the inside, he's a serious guy with big plans (he's still chasing his crazy, pachyderm-filled, eleventy billion dollar dream to get his Hannibal trilogy made—in Punic!) and who isn't immune to the pain of the oft-whispered speculation about his sexuality. He confides to Details, the go-to publication for men seeking to dispel dogged gay rumors:

The most persistent rumor is that he s gay. He was once linked to his Furious costar Michelle Rodriguez, but since then he s never been spotted with a girlfriend, never been seen sneaking out of L.A. s Element draped with a sloppy WB starlet. A female radio-talk-show caller in New York even confronted him about his sexuality, asking point-blank if Vin played for the other team.

I was like, How could you say that? Why would you say that? says Diesel, the smooth space between his brown eyes wrinkling up in a neat W. I m not gonna put it out there on a magazine cover like some other actors. I come from the Harrison Ford, Marlon Brando, Robert De Niro, Al Pacino code of silence. I m not gonna do that.

For that reason, Diesel prefers dating in Europe, where he s not as easily recognized. He thinks celebrity-on-celebrity hookups are crazy. People going through your trash, taking your photo at Starbucks, mashing up your last names into a Bennifer-style punch line. It s a sucker s bet, he says.

Publicists everywhere are certainly rejoicing at Diesel's inadvertent gift to their profession, as "he prefers dating in Europe" should immediately supplant "he's just his personal trainer" as the preferred excuse for clients who linger too long between public heteroexual relationships.