Only Bombs New Airport Dogs Can Smell Are Probably Starring Jim Carrey
Ever on the lookout for new and cutting edge methods with which to curtail the proliferation of pirated materials, the MPAA is licking its chops at news of two British Labradors who have been successfully taught to sniff out DVDs in airport packages:
The MPAA says there are currently two DVD-sniffing dogs in the world. They are Labradors named Lucky and Flo working at Stansted Airport in the United Kingdom. The canines have been taught to recognize the unique smell of a compact disc. [...]
The dogs have had some success so far, according to the MPAA. But there is still more training that needs to be done. At this point, the dogs alert police to any CD or DVD they smell in packages and bags. Customs officials in the U.K. hope one day the dogs will only signal when there are large collections of discs, which would more likely include illegally copied movies.
News of the indiscriminate DVD-rooting pooches immediately struck terror into the hearts of men everywhere—not the movie pirates, per se, but those of globe-trotting porn connoisseurs, who are now at risk of not only the embarrassment of being outed as the devoted fans of the Cumdumpers series they truly are, but also of having their mint collector's edition of the entire 8-volume series mangled by the slobbering maws of the overzealous canine detectives.
