Kinder, Gentler Military Just Wants to Cuddle
A day after a grateful nation commemorated the sacrifices of the men and women sworn to protect it, The Times weighs in with a troubling report on the state of our country's military. Apparently, sailors in town for Fleet Week are eschewing traditional New York City activities like fucking tranny hookers in cheap West Side Highway motels for slightly less adventurous pursuits:
William Hamb, 34, a petty officer first class on the Kearsarge, was planning on having a frozen cappuccino at Serendipity 3 on East 60th Street. Geoffrey Roediger, 22, a boatswain's mate third class from St. Matthews, S.C., went to see the Off Broadway musical satire "Burleigh Grime$." And Jason Kinsey, a boatswain's mate first class on the Kearsarge, wanted to visit the Museum of Comic and Cartoon Art on Broadway in SoHo for its exhibition "She Draws Comics: 100 Years of America's Women Cartoonists."
On the other hand, even innocent New York activities are not without inherent dangers: Just try cutting in line at Magnolia Bakery and see how quickly those "Sex and the City" bitches will slice you.