Richard Hatch Banished To Camp Cupcake For Men
Tax-evading reality TV star Richard Hatch has finally made it to his new prison home for the next 51 months, give or take a few for good behavior. And while his temporary internment facility, the Federal Transfer Center in Oklahoma, was nothing like they advertised in the brochures, we imagine the Federal Correctional Instutions at Morgantown will provide for a much more pleasant incarceration experience:
Morgantown is described as comparable to a minimum-security federal prison camp. There are no security fences or guard towers and inmates are mostly free to go where they choose within the prison. Inmates live in dormitory style housing.
One prison official, speaking on the condition of anonymity described as a male Camp Cupcake the nickname of the federal facility in West Virginia where Martha Stewart served out her sentence.
The cushy, open-itinerary policy of Camp Beefcake might prove to be woefully lacking in structured immunity challenges, opportunities for Machiavellian conspiring, and post-lockdown, bunk-bed-bitch-overpowering sessions for Hatch's rough-and-tumble tastes. Still, Hatch is a resourceful man who demonstrates great cunning and grace under pressure. Like Stewart, we have no doubt he'll maximize his time behind bars, and it won't be long before he is addressing a group of reporters gathered to cover his release sporting his very own self-macraméd freedom poncho, and precious else underneath.
