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Rather than submit to a force-feeding of mindless he-witch fare or the Jackass Collective's latest foray into experimental reverse-peristalsis- and-blunt-force-genital-trauma cinema, an angry Illinois theater owner decided to issue the studios the ultimate symbolic "fuck you" (or at least the ultimate symbolic "fuck you" available to someone with just two movie screens): shutting down for two weeks to protest the "drivel" Hollywood is currently offering. Reports the LAT:

Lorraine owner Greg Boardman put his two screens on hiatus rather than sell tickets to the gross-out and freakout fare he said Hollywood distributors had made available in recent weeks. Boardman said he'd rather show nothing than such recent offerings as "Beerfest," "The Covenant" or the "Jackass" sequel, which topped the nation's box office last week despite being panned by critics.

"There's just so much lousy material out there — people vomiting on the screen," said Boardman, 52, who grew up watching movies in the Lorraine and now runs the business from Northern California. "I have one of the finest sound systems in the world, and I don't want to waste it on such drivel."

The article notes that the hiatus is ending today with the release of this year's seventy-fifth offering of talking, computer-generated animals, Open Season, and a screening of Invincible, one of two uplifting football movies currently in multiplex rotation. So either the maverick owner has suddenly lowered his drivel-threshold after two revenue-free weeks, or he's planning a far more spectacular protest: luring Ashton Kutcher and Mark Wahlberg fans into his theater and burning the place to the ground, a bold, fiery statement about the third-rate product Hollywood expects the public to consume week after week.