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Your Moment this morning comes from a recent Observer (U.K.) article by Mimi Spencer on the differences between men and women when it comes to dining out. The entire thing is a sustained literary assault, but we'll just start you off from the beginning to give you a taste:

While men want a concise menu, something to the point and well signposted like a PowerPoint presentation (bacon and eggs; sausage and mash; liver and bacon; chicken in a basket; hog in a bun; that sort of thing), women prefer to slow-dance through the dishes in a manner similar to the way in which we buy shoes, with leeway for thinking, 'Oh, shall I? Shall I? Ooh maybe', et cetera. This window-shopping could take some time. Almost as long as a nice cold bottle of Chablis. However, restaurateurs should beware: if it's all too fussy - for instance, if the first item reads, 'Prosciutto Pio Tosini, 18 months, Parma, Italy, Home-made Hungarian Elk Salumi, Crostini, pickled Fiddlehead Ferns and Cured Olives blah blah blah' - we'll get Menu Vertigo, and fall headlong towards the bottom of the page...

We know how you feel, Mimi.

A girl's guide to eating and drinking [Observer]