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Our sleep last night was fitful and feverish, so tormented were we by the queasy feeling that we would awake this morning to discover that Vince Vaughn and Jennifer Aniston's publicists had released a joint statement assuring their fans that despite the fact the two lovers would never again be seen in each other's company and forever maintain separate residences in different time zones, they were still very much committed to being a couple, robbing us of the sweet closure we desperately and naively hoped we'd achieved with yesterday afternoon's Page Six report of their break-up. Mercifully, Vaughn and Aniston's flacks have reached detente on the dissolution of their clients' relationship, confirming—exclusively!—to People that while the duo will presumably no longer engage in the strange acts of pantomimed intimacy they enjoyed during their year-long, tabloid-attracting association, they remain "good friends." Perhaps sleep will come more easily tonight.

Things have so far been quiet on the Aniston front, but it seems that Vaughn's people are hard at work on their Vince Is A Swinging Bachelor On The Loose In Foreign Lands campaign, already getting a Hungarian titty-bar sighting under their belts, as well as this morning's Star story of a nonpenetrative romantic encounter in Budapest with a 20-year-old sorority girl who e-mailed 22 of her sisters a report about, like, the greatest hook-up that ever happened! OMG! Star excerpts the e-mail:

...next thing I know it was me and Vince Vaughn alone in the hotel room. For a while we just had a drink and talked some more (and yes, we talked about Jen) and one thing led to another and obviously we were messing around before too long. We didn't have sex, but it was just as good :) Afterward we just laid in his gigantic beautiful bed with satin sheets, smoking cigarettes and talking about life. He had a gorgeous view of the river and Buda Castle from his window, and we watched the sunrise. I felt like I was in a movie. We didn't ever go to sleep and in the morning he walked me out and kissed me goodbye in front of everyone and was so sweet.

Unfortunately for Vaughn, when he kissed her goodbye and urged her to wait at least two days before e-mailing her girlfriends about their "shacking," she took him seriously when he requested, "Make sure you leave out the part about my giving you unreciprocated oral sex. That's just for us. I'd hate for that to get out in the tabloids and wind up with a reputation for being the most sensitive, generous lover a sorority girl could possibly imagine," an omission that's preventing the public from fully sharing in the magic of their incredible evening.