"Because when the breakup's this big, no less than giant yellow coverlines will do," says Eat The Press. Well, yeah, totally . . . except, if you look really closely, each of those covers trumpets the earthshattering demise of an entirely different celebrity couple (or, in the case of Us, "couple.") Could Us have sort of pulled the Kate and Owen thing out of its ass to compete with Star, which hit newsstands first? We guess we'll never know.

'Star': It's Just Like 'Us!' [ETP]