Hearst Tower Tortures Tourist
An apartment-hopper writes in to say that s/he is being tortured by the Hearst building. (Hey, how do you think Helen Gurley Brown feels?) "I'm temporarily staying at an apartment in midtown whose bedroom window faces the ginormous monstrosity that is their new headquarters and those bitches never turn off their lights! Rows upon rows, floor after floor, it's like a greenhouse of squandered fluorescent energy. Unfortunately the window shades are sheer, and it's not my apartment! They have a video about how the tower is 'NYC's first green building' but how can that be possible when they're using energy all night, every night, for nothing?? Please make them shut off the lights! Even if it's only for five minutes.. I need to get some sleep!" Please enjoy your stay in midtown, friend, and then quickly return to whatever crazy blacked-out rural borough in which you reside.