Breaking! Hero Clooney Embarks On Million-Dollar Quest To Find The Real Leaker!
It's not quite the CLOONEY PLACES MILLION DOLLAR BOUNTY ON HEAD OF REAL RUSSELL VIDEO LEAK we were hoping for, but still, not bad.
[Also: We feel like such dirty, dirty little whores now that George and his trusty flack are running around sticking his filthy denial in every quivering media-hole they can find. We thought we were special! You know what? Fuck Darfur!]