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It's hardly a secret that big-budget Hollywood moviemaking is perhaps the most financially wasteful of human endeavors, with each prospective blockbuster production lavishing hundreds of thousands of dollars (if not millions) in perks to ensure the constant comfort of its above-the-title talent, who can only practice their craft if their demands for individual pedicurists for each toe and a double-wide equipped with a spa-tub that bubbles forth perfectly chilled Cristal at the touch of a button are fully met. Sunday's LAT featured a must-read Special! Report! revealing the budget of high-eight-figures loser Sahara "confidentially" submitted as an exhibit in the ongoing lawsuits between author Clive Cussler and producer Philip Anschutz, two fierce combatants in the process of suing the living shit out of one another (we apologize for the use of that highly technical legal jargon) in an attempt to figure out who bears the majority of the blame for the movie's profound failure. After the jump, we've excerpted some of the budget's highlights; the Times is careful to disclaim that "actual expenses may have varied from budgeted items," leaving some hope that impenetrably accented actress Penelope Cruz's dialogue coaches, who would have been woefully underpaid at the stated $125,804, ultimately received substantial additional remuneration for bravely performing one of the most dangerous and thankless jobs in all of show business:

Matthew McConaughey:
 Salary: $8 million
Perks: $833,923
Entourage travel: $179,262
Makeup artist: $150,223
Stunt double: $124,740
Colorist: $72,800
Trainer: $67,977
Personal chef: $48,893

Penelope Cruz:
 Salary: $1.6 million
Perks: $835,561
Entourage travel: $227,515
Hairstylist: $135,550
Makeup artist: $135,550
Dialogue coaches: $125,804

Steve Zahn:
 Salary: $2.2 million
Perks: $264,153

Miscellaneous fun:
 Story and rights:$14.1 million
- Clive Cussler: $10 million
- Writers: $3.8 million

Composer Clint Mansell: $800,000
Director Breck Eisner: $750,000