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It's a sad day for scheming opportunists everywhere, as the jury in the case of David Chase Vs. Some Guy Who Didn't Write The Sopranos has ruled in favor of the genius creator/showrunner and against Robert Baer. Who? Exactly.

Baer claimed he provided help — arranging meetings with police and prosecutors during a three-day tour of New Jersey mob sites in 1995 and engaging in subsequent conversations — that sparked ideas for what b ecame the hit HBO mob drama that ended in June.

Both men testified that Baer turned down compensation from Chase three times. But Baer claimed Chase agreed to "take care of him" if the show was a hit. Baer said no monetary figure was ever discussed. Chase never offered him a writing job on the show.

Baer's case was systematically undermined over the course of the five day trial. His "three-day tour of New Jersey mob sites" was revealed to be a "three day tour of New Jersey's best places to get a calzone"; Baer's protestations that this constituted a tour of mob sites by default did not sway the jury. Furthermore, Baer's only "meetings with police and prosecutors" will be if he's tried for perjury for swearing under oath to have a dog named "Big Pussy." David Chase, meanwhile, has kept his word. Baer's been taken care of.