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What better way to annul your time spent in rehab than by pulling the old “It was just research!” card? That’s what Eva Mendes is allegedly claiming, pegging her January stay at Le Cirque in Utah to an upcoming role in Queen Of The South where she'll play a female drug lord or, as some have termed the character, “the female Scarface.” At the time, so-called insiders came forward saying Mendes was everything from a “closet drinker” to a prescription drug addict. Though it’s a nice thought that Mendes’ month-long stay alongside real-live drunk Kirsten Dunst was just a hush-hush effort to really feel like a druggie, we took a look at the timeline coupled with Mendes’ past, and find the excuse weak at best:

For one thing, Mendes has already appeared in her fair share of drug movies. There was last year’s We Own The Night, where she played the coke-dabbling girlfriend to Joaquin Phoenix’s drug dealer with a heart of gold. And 2003’s Once Upon A Time In Mexico centered around the Mexican president declaring war on a drug cartel, while that same year she played drug money-lover Denzel Washington’s ex-wife in Out Of Time. As for her potentially career-boosting role in Queen, her casting was announced only two weeks ago. Until her stay in rehab, two other names were still circling around the part: Jennifer Lopez and Penelope Cruz were said to be in consideration for the part as well. We only wish they’d gone with Cruz early on and relieved Mendes of the need to method act her way all the way to Le Cirque and scandal; Cruz already nailed the powdered-up girlfriend in Blow so convincingly that we still can’t help looking at her without getting the sense that she’s just itching to snort the dandruff off of whatever guy has currently enlisted her as their Beard.