Battlestar Galactica: The End
So last night was the mid-season finale of the Sci-Fi Channel's space Bar Mitzvah Battlestar Galactica. Yep, no more episodes til January, so I paid special close attention. Actually, no, of course I didn't. I didn't even know it was the mid-season finale until I read it in the news this morning! So this week's roundup is just as whiskey-warbled as ever. This time I know there are spoilers, so keep out if you care about that. If not, jump!
- Old Eyepatchy just outed himself to Miami Vice! "I'm one of the four." Kill him!
- But Miami Vice thinks Eyepatchy just has a chip in his head. "When I met you you had hair. I never heard of a skin job aging."
- But Eyepatchy has a way out! You can live! You can live! Freeeeeedom!
- Miami Vice: "There is no fracking earth!" Geez, kinda cheer up already, old man. These space people look up to you!
- Yeah, torture Eyepatchy! Torture him to madness!
- Hey wait! You're not President Boringface Actorman. You're gonna kill the fleet? You're the bad guy?! Kill him!
- Don't you people point your guns at Blonde Tomboy Space Girl! Shoot Chief Fatty Q. Workingstiff in his gut if you wanna, but leave Blonde Tomboy Space Girl alone!
- OMG! Cyclons! Cyclons everywhere!
- You Secret Cyclons are fucked!
- Yes! Blonde Tomboy Space Girl is in her space plane! She'll save everyone! She is God with a pretty nose and nice hair!
- Awww! Look how happy she is! She knows something...
- I'm gonna put exclamation points here! here! and here!
- Oh Jesusface. You're the good guy?!
- Kill President Boringface Actorman! Kill him dead!
- Oh shut up Xena. They'd forgive you for what you did on the colonies if you'd stop killing them. So stop killing them!
- Blonde Tomboy Space Girl did it! She saved everyone! Yaaaaaay!
- Amnesty for the Secret Cyclons! Yaaaaay!
- Boringface and Lady MacDeath and Miami Vice are all best buds now. Yaaaaaay!
- Earth! Earth! Earth! Earth! Earth! Yaaaaaaay!
- Um, uh? What the fuck is up with earth? It's all...
- You maniacs! You blew it up! Damn you! Damn you all to hell!