As we approach America's 232nd birthday bonanza celebration, we here at Defamer HQ can't help but feel more than a little bit patriotic. After all, this great country of ours affords us so many rights and privileges. Like the right to bear arms! And the right to free speech! And the right to shoplift a tanktop from Express when you were but a teenag ... wait, what? We don't remember reading about that last right in our history books, so what is Molls doing waving that factoid in our faces in this evening's To Do's? Well, you'll just have to watch and see...

· Garden Party Evening at The Found Gallery.

· Alice Russell at Hotel Cafe.

· An Adult Evening of Shel Silverstein @ Odyssey Theater.