Happy Monday. Hopefully your weekends were restful and relaxing. Or wild and weird. However you like it. Five blind items for you this rainy morning. An edible underwear enthusiast, a secretly swinging couple, a spoiled television actress, a sex-crazed Yankee, and someone who is "not Megan Fox." Enjoy a condensed version of your hedonistic weekend after the jump.

1) "Which pervy cad about town has yet another weird penchant ... for edible underwear? He makes all of his ladies wear a specially made licorice thong that he likes to slowly chew off of them." [NYDN]

2) "Which supposedly strait-laced couple, who harp on about the joys of domesticity, actually enjoy an open marriage - regularly bringing home new partners to experiment with?" [Mirror]

3) "So this C list television actress with A list name recognition was supposed to star in an old family standby. Everyone was excited to have her on board and thought everything was great. Then at the filming of the promos for the show, our actress was a no-show. Apparently she was too tired to come in and film, but would try and come in a few days or perhaps they could just film out at her place. Whatever was more convenient for her. The producers, instead of putting up with crap and creating some kind of diva monster, cut her loose from the project right then and brought in an old nemesis instead who has been a perfect angel." [CDaN]

4) "What former NY Yankees pitcher and still in the major leagues had an affair with a teammate's wife, and then later with that same teammate's girlfriend. (This has nothing to do in any way, shape, or form with Alex Rodriguez except who knows, maybe he slept with them both as well. I don't know.)" [CDaN]

5) "Apparently random acts of vandalism against her ex's stuff is the way this B- television and C list film actress is getting her revenge on the guy she dumped, but says she didn't. No, not Megan Fox. Think meaner and older. Not that old." [CDaN]