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Bernie Kerik needs your help! The former police commissioner is defending himself on charges he accepted bribes, didn't report the freebies to the IRS, and later lied when he was being vetted for Homeland Security chief in 2004. But he's run out of money to pay his lawyers, and is having trouble paying for his Jersey mansion and his BMW and Range Rover! So he's turning to the public for help. He's set up a sad, little website with photos of him posing alongside his former BFF, Rudy Giuliani. Even sadder: He's throwing a fundraiser at a catering hall in Paterson, NJ in a few weeks and hoping to get people to hand over $75 to attend. [NYP]