Snow White, Esquire Vs. 'Beverly Hills Ninja 2': Vote Now For the Least-Essential Project of 2009
The trades are alight with hellfire today as the End of Ideas train has derailed once again, exploding and settling a fine, acrid dust on the surfaces of morning lattes all over town. And as you sip yours, know that you're not hallucinating, despite what you've read: Sony really does plan a sequel to the late Chris Farley's non-essential Beverly Hills Ninja, summoning a script from the original film's screenwriter and conceiving it as the first mainstream American film to be shot entirely in South Korea. We're sure the nation is thrilled — more excited, anyhow, than it would be if it faced the prospect of a contemporary Snow White revision tentatively titled Georgia and the Seven Associates. Right. As in "lawyers":
[T]he hourlong dramedy, produced by ABC Studios, is tonally described as The Devil Wears Prada meets Taxi set in Los Angeles' legal circles.
It centers on Georgia Burnett, a young lawyer who is banished from a top law firm run by her stepmother and forced to team up with seven quirky lawyers at a storefront legal office. "It is L.A. Law vs. the little engine that could," said [co-producer Chris] Brancato. ... The associates at the firm will have the personalities of the Seven Dwarfs. For instance, Doc is an ambulance chaser who carries neck braces in his trunk, and Sleepy is a bike messenger who parties at night and naps in the office.
And Sneezy is the hotshot with the coke habit, and Dopey is the sweet, shy paralegal... enough, we get it. These are ideas whose times have not officially come, thank God, and if justice avails itself, your vote may count in the cosmic quest to kill one evil twin before the pair combine to subsume us in 2009. In the spirit of social activism that this election year encourages, stand up, and let every voice be heard:
