By now you're well aware that William "Bill" Shatner has not been written into J.J. Abrams's Star Trek movie, an egregious cast omission all but certain to sink this latest Enterprise before it even manages to nudge itself off its launching dock. But the fact of the matter is that he isn't, and while we seem to have come to terms with it, Shatner has not. It has thus evolved into precisely the kind of nerd-slight that gets bounced to and fro on the internets for us to stand by and watch like some interminable Pong game, just with less suspense or investment in the outcome. The latest chapter sucks Shatner's daughter Liz into the proceedings—surprisingly normal-looking considering she was the product of a one-beam-stand with a hot little green number from Orion—in which they both clear the record. Bill was not, we repeat not, approached to appear in Star Trek, J.J. Won't you reconsider? No? OK.