Gangsta Trap, or: A Prayer For Ed McMahon
Earlier this summer, when the news emerged that Sidekick Hall of Fame charter member Ed McMahon was facing imminent foreclosure on and eviction from his Beverly Hills residence, an outpouring of sympathy and support quickly followed from many directions. McMahon's real estate agent threw a Hail Mary as time ran out on his bank's clock. Donald Trump, citing the 85 year old's military heroism and monolithic pop-culture standing, made the one-handed catch for the win. He cameoed last weekend in Josh Groban's Emmy-night Miracle on Figueroa Street. But mostly McMahon has fielded one bone after another thrown his way by the advertising industry — which is turning into a bit of a problem if the new, pimptastic pitchman now being rolled out for the highest bidder is any indication.Obviously this is not new terrain for McMahon; by his own admission the man has "spent my whole life doing commercials," all the way back to having paid his way through college selling vegetable slicers. When he required hospitalization last year for treatment of a broken neck, he all but summoned the Publishers Clearing House prize van before cooler heads dialed 9-1-1. The guy is a born huckster. We get that. We also know that under the circumstances, McMahon probably isn't using the soundest, most selective judgment. Exhibit A: This recently released still from the set of his latest commercial, featuring McMahon — a prodigiously generous man who sat at Johnny Carson's right hand for three decades — as a pimp selling... Hey, you know what? Fuck them. If you wanna look the vultures up, go for it. We know the contradiction that comes with covering this in the first place, but we understand debasement even better, and the long-term potential here outweighs the immediate scourge. Again: Ed McMahon is dressed like a gangsta. Where is Don Draper when we need him? Is this really the best you can do, Madison Avenue? Moreover, where is Hollywood when McMahon needs it? Just when things were looking up, the guy requires someone, anyone to fend off the vampires sucking away what remains of his dignity. Remember, people: Ed McMahon. Any volunteers? [Photo: ETOnline]