Thick-necked celebrity son Luke Russert is having an Inauguration Eve party! For that black guy who won! Would you like to go? Here is the invitation.

The Rookery is a bar/restaurant that is, like 8th grade birthday parties and the marriage certificate line at Sacramento city hall, invite-only. How exclusive. But in the spirit of the White House opening its back door and letting Barack Obama and his lovely family shuffle in, The Rookery is allowing any Joe, Dick, or John-Jane Georgetown party it up at their joint. For 95 Confederate dollars you get a free open bar until 4am (4am!! DC passed a special dispensation allowing bars to stay open, like when they had the Olympics in Salt Lake and people were allowed to drink and touch each other's privates and stuff). Oh, and yeah. Luke, son of late Meet the Press host Tim, will be doing a hosting duty of his own. Hopefully there's a hot tub. A band called Old Man Brown is playing which is... um... unfortunate.

Ah well. So you can get classily shitcanned (jacket required!) all night and then stumble over to watch history happen. Then stumble home and watch the party on HBO, which will feature the old moderate-hippie stylings of Babs and The Boss.

You won't remember any of it, but you'll have participated. Which is all that matters.