Lindsay Lohan Attacked By Feral Cat
Or, you know, she's back on drugs or cutting or something. Her arms are all scratched up. She's tried to hide it with long sleeves, but people have still noticed.
- She's also lost a lot of weight. Maybe it's because she's in a lesbian relationship with a lesbian. Or maybe her tabby, Chaskitty Bono, has finally decided to wage her long-planned rebellion. [Showbiz Spy]
- The Pussycat Dolls, a band so curiously unsexy that even your horny cousin Len can't seem to get excited about them, started out as a garage band. Specifically, in Christina Applegate's garage. This was way back in the miniskirty, midriffy mid-90's. [Showbiz Spy]
- Mostly unfunny comedienne Chelsea Handler would like you to have sex with the always unfunny comedian Artie Lange. For money. She'll pay you $500. It's part of their K-list celebrity feud. So, it'd totally be worth it. [NYDN]
- Why won't you let Kanye West be great? Seriously, why won't you? All he wants to do is wear his shuttershades, cry for a couple of minutes, and be great. Maybe he also wants to make a bisexual pornography film. Maybe. But mostly, he just wants to be great. And you won't let him. Now you've gone and made him use the internet again to tell you how upset he is with you. I hope you're happy. [P6]
- He may be a racist joke-making git sometimes, but he's ginger and worth his weight in one billion pound notes and can fly a helicopter, so we still love Prince Harry. Ohh, and now he's single. He's split with that slag Chelsea Davy, this time for good. So ladies, the fox hunt is on. To the hounds. Tallyho! [Us]
- Lonely and miserable sadsack Jennifer Aniston has resorted to stalking. Her untouchably-beautiful ex-husband Bradley Jane Pitt and his swashbuckling ladyfriend, Angelina Jolie, got invited to an Oscars party called the Academy Awards and have decided to go. So Aniston sneaked in the backdoor by getting hired as a waitress or a coat check girl or maybe an awards presenter or something. Potential for zany, madcap antics abounds, sure, but mostly it's just going to be mournful and quiet and just a little bit unsettling and creepy. Until she gets the cream pie in her face! Then oh how they'll laugh. They're all gonna laugh at you, Jen. They're all gonna laugh at you... [Star]