A SAG-sack returns, two beauties team up for impossibly beautiful lovemaking, Up graces Cannes, Kevin Costner is back, and so is Behind the Music.

Bradley Jane Pitt and Natalie Portman will be starring in a romantic comedy together, based on the book Important Artifacts and Personal Property From the Collection of Lenore Doolan and Harold Morris, Including Books, Street Fashion and Jewelry. Then a sunset and a sunrise will do a movie with a forty word title and we'll be forced to argue forever about which one starred the more beautiful things and had the most annoying name. [Variety] Kevin Costner is still working. So that's something. [Variety]

Are you ready for a boy version of Splash? Too bad. Brian Grazer is producing a new movie called Merman that is about just such an abomination. Keep a close eye out for Darryl Hannah in one scene. She's that extra, all blurry in the background, weeping. [Variety] Speaking of weeping, poor sad former SAG exec Doug Allen, who was fired two months ago, popped back up on the picket lines yesterday. After he wandered around for awhile, distractedly eating a hot dog and faintly humming a song no one could identify, someone finally asked what he was doing there. "I heard that some of my friends were here," he told them (foreal). Everyone felt bad for him and let him hold a sign but afterwards when everyone went to go get beers together, they told him they were all just going home. [Variety]

Disney/Pixar's fancy new computer movie Up is set to open the Festival de Cannes, that humble little film festival that happens every May, going mostly unnoticed, down in the south of France. [THR] In the realm of actually small, actually important news, the husband of Adrienne Shelly, the New York-based Waitress filmmaker who was murdered two years ago, is producing a finished screenplay she left behind, a decades-spanning family drama called The Morgan Stories. [THR]

VH1 is kicking aside the pile of bottles, cans, and dead groupies to pick up one of their old standbys. The network is reviving its former flagship series Behind the Music, with Lil' Wayne and Lil' Scott Weiland already set to appear. Oh goody. Don't you want to know more about what happens behind the music of, say, ... (The sad/funny thing about this is that I was trying to come up with a joke about some current music star. But then I couldn't think of any because I have no idea what the kids are listening to anymore. So, I'll just leave it hear. A sad, sorry blank.) [THR]