You know that movie James Cameron has been working on for more than 10 years and spent more than $200 million dollars? Turns out it's just a bunch of blue cartoons? We feel cheated.

This thing looks faker than that stripper's third tit in Total Recall. Even the real humans look fake! Why would you do that to Zoe Saldana? Why?!

Anyway the movie is about a paralyzed American soldier who takes a job mining on a far away planet that is home to an alien race. The thing is, human's can't live on the planet, so they have to use avatars, clones of the blue-toons that are inhabited by the consciousness of the humans. Of course, our human eventually falls in love with a blue-toon and joins her people's fight to get humans to stop destroying her planet and leave. Colonialism! Environmentalism! See, District 9 isn't the only message movie.

Cameron should have learned his lesson from the Star Wars prequels: if you don't step away from the cinematic easel, you're going to end up with a canvas that is full of pretty doodles and no life. Or in this case, horny blue-toons that like to fight then make out. Well, we're glad our expectations have been lowered, so that the 3-D version might still blow us away. Don't let us down, Cameron. You probably won't have a chance to make it up to us until your next movie in 2025.