Former House Majority Leader Tom DeLay will appear on any low-rent TV show that will take him. On Dancing With The Stars he was at least given the dignity of competing as one of the "stars," but not on Millionaire.

No, on Who Wants to Be a Millionaire—the daytime version!—DeLay will appear via "Skype" (they will not get him a town car to a proper studio, even!) as a mere lifeline, for some nobody contestant. The lifeline is called "Ask the Expert," so let's hope for Tom's sake that the contestants end up stuck on questions of pest extermination, and not, say, Texas election law.